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In response to kitiara's post about relationships and the stress of anticipation vs. trying to find reality and balance expectation:
I completely understand that feeling, in fact the husband and I went through a very similar circumstance. Knowing that we wanted to be together in the short term was easy; we were nearly identical and what a spark! But the longer term was much more difficult. I knew early on what I wanted, I've been around the block enough times to know what I want and need. He'd been hurt early and hadn't a lot of experience in dating and I knew it. We had one disastrous conversation early on about long-term expectations. Boy was that a mess.

So I kept my mouth shut, hoping desperately that he'd decide our relationship might go in the direction I wanted it to. But of course we couldn't talk about it. So I spent about 9 months or so trying to pretend that I wasn't hoping but unable to help myself. It was torture, but it certainly made for interesting times. Never a dull moment. And I wouldn't trade it for the world. I learned more about each of us, separate and together, in that time than I would have if we'd known where it was going.

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It's very much a "you have to take the good with the bad" sort of scenario - the anticipation is fun, but the anticipation is also stressful. :) I would be going nuts if I couldn't talk about though, I have to say that. All the things I wrote about, I'd already discussed with John, and thanfully he doesn't seem to mind listening to me overanalyzing every little thing nonstop!

If only there were some way to tell our bodies "Hey, yes I'm anticipating this! But there is no chance that I'm going to have to go into a deatchmatch!"

I'm glad you're sharing this with us after passing it through the John litmus test. While I would love to know Right Now on everything (patience? what's that?) I don't think it would be very good for your relationship-that-shall-0not-be-named-such. :)

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